S2E2 | A Carl By Any Other Name Is Just as Sweet

Welcome back to Big Red Button, the podcast where the post-apocalyptic chaos never ends!

In this episode, our fearless adventurers—Jake, Houston, and Gotfree—are back in action, navigating the wild world of Fallout! With Mr. Klawzinski by their side, they uncover shocking truths about their friend, Crazy Carl... or should we say Carlos? This former vault security chief has a few secrets up his sleeve!

TIME STAMPS:

(00:00:00) - Introduction and Recap

(00:05:00) - Summer Break Shenanigans

(00:15:00) - The Carlos Mendoza Revelation

(00:25:00) - Mr. Klawzinski's Vault Tales

(00:35:00) - Carlos's Combat Skills Unveiled

(00:45:00) - Rescue Mission Planning

(00:54:00) - Weapon Negotiations with Mr. Klawzinski

(01:00:00) - Super Mutant Communication Secrets

(01:05:00) - Final Plans and Preparations

(01:08:00) - Wrapping Up

(01:09:00) - Outro and Podcast Info

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

- Summer Break Dreams: Gotfree dreams of a Poconos getaway, while Jake reminisces about vault life. Who knew robots had vacation plans?

- Carlos's Secret Identity: Discover the truth about "Crazy Carl"—a vault security pro with a knack for lip-reading. Can our heroes trust him?

- Rescue Mission Madness: The team devises a plan to save their Super Mutant pals using a unique tree-lighting system. Will it work?

- Weapon Negotiations: Mr. Klawzinski agrees to arm our heroes if they succeed in their mission. But can they pull it off?

Join us for a rollercoaster of revelations, humor, and high-stakes decisions as our crew navigates the unpredictable Fallout universe!

Transcript

Gotfree [1:01 - 1:08]: Previously on the Big Red Button, the podcast it's all about, well, me and these other characters. 

Jake [1:08 - 1:22]: Is it damp in here? To anybody? Like a little humid, Almost kind of like moist. Yeah, must be moist. No, never mind. 

Gotfree [1:22 - 1:23]: It stained. 

Houston [1:24 - 1:27]: See those glowing mushrooms back there? You can eat those. 

Jake [1:28 - 1:32]: It's funny because he doesn't know that glowing mushrooms are a thing in the fallout world. 

Dallas [1:32 - 1:44]: On one end, on the left, you see those stables. And on each stable there's a name. And then those transition to the huge forest. You see other Mr. Handies that are tending to this forest. 

Houston [1:44 - 1:45]: Oh, great, there's more of them. 

Gotfree [1:46 - 1:52]: Hello there. Hello. Hello. My name is Godfrey. Hello, Godfrey. My name is Gerald. It's a pleasure to meet you, Josh. 

Jake [1:52 - 1:53]: There's two of them now. 

Houston [1:53 - 1:56]: I think I'm gonna take another chance with the cannibals. 

Klawzinski [1:57 - 2:09]: My friends call me Mr. Claus. Any friend of my boys is a friend of mine. And so if you are with and you are still alive, I'm assuming you are pretty good people. 

Jake [2:09 - 2:13]: Welcome to Rob Go. Cleaning procedure. 

Gotfree [2:15 - 2:16]: This is the. 

Dallas [2:19 - 2:19]: Stuff. 

Houston [2:19 - 2:21]: My boy is a man now. 

Klawzinski [2:21 - 2:23]: What is it that you mean about cannibals? 

Jake [2:23 - 2:41]: Now? Half of the boys are heading there now to protect our friend Carl, who has a robot named Phyllis. And he won't leave, even though the rest of the town is heading to New Detroit. But we know that there's a much larger cannibal party that's headed to Duskridge. 

Houston [2:42 - 2:45]: Okay, I just. I wanna clear the air here. Yes, Mr. Klaus. 

Klawzinski [2:45 - 2:46]: Yes, Houston? 

Houston [2:46 - 2:47]: Your last name is Klaus? 

Klawzinski [2:47 - 2:49]: My last name is Klausinski. 

Houston [2:49 - 2:51]: Klosinski. But people call you Mr. Klaus? 

Klawzinski [2:51 - 2:53]: Yes, because of my large Claus. 

Houston [2:54 - 2:59]: All right, you have a workshop, you say ho, ho, ho. Are you Santa Claus? 

Klawzinski [2:59 - 3:11]: So you are telling me there's a man who gives magical toys and there is a creature that possesses people. I think you guys are making things up. Did you eat the mushrooms on the way in? 

Jake [3:12 - 3:15]: Wait, Houston told me to. What? Was I not supposed to? 

Klawzinski [3:15 - 3:16]: No bone. 

Jake [3:17 - 3:18]: I may have. I may have had. 

Klawzinski [3:18 - 3:23]: Those are highly hallucinogenic mushrooms. What is wrong with you? 

Jake [3:23 - 3:27]: And I get out of the bed and I just book it into the forest. 

Gotfree [3:27 - 3:29]: You can't get me. 

Klawzinski [3:30 - 3:35]: Yeah, the mushrooms are about to get a whole lot worse. For Mr. Winger. Buckle up. 

Dallas [3:39 - 4:31]: This went so far off the rails. I have. I have an entire three pages of stuff written out, and we didn't get past a quarter of the first page. We got past a description of two rooms. That's it. Welcome, everyone, back to the big red button. Stretch your legs, oil your joints, and buckle up, because it's about to get real stupid up in here. We. We have taken a little. 

Jake [4:32 - 4:33]: Yeah, we did. 

Dallas [4:33 - 4:39]: The. The four of us. I always want to refer to us as three, because I'm not really here whenever we start. 

Jake [4:40 - 4:45]: I think we firmly established in the last episode that you are, in fact, real. 

Dallas [4:46 - 5:00]: That's true. I made a cameo. But only if lots of hallucinogens are consumed do you guys get to peek beyond the veil. I'm as real as a squirrel in. In this world, so. Whoa. I do. There's only three tokens on. 

Jake [5:00 - 5:02]: Yeah, but a really sexy squirrel. 

Dallas [5:02 - 5:04]: That's true. That shaves its legs weirdly. 

Jake [5:04 - 5:07]: But you. 

Houston [5:07 - 5:10]: Actually, Dallas, is. You've been a squirrel this whole time. 

Jake [5:10 - 5:16]: It was all a dream. I've been thinking about us. Think about. No, never mind. 

Dallas [5:16 - 5:20]: Wow. We're getting. We're starting this real stupid up in here. 

Jake [5:20 - 5:24]: Like you said, just live to the expectations. 

Dallas [5:24 - 5:40]: Houston and Jake, present and or accounted for. Sir, how did you. Or would you have. If you were built and designed and didn't go to school, how would you have spent your time during your summer breaks? 

Gotfree [5:40 - 5:54]: I know exactly how I would spend my break. As a matter of fact, I have robotic dreams of it on a daily basis. I would have a nice, lovely weekend vacationing in the Poconos. 

Houston [5:54 - 5:57]: I have heard random. 

Gotfree [5:57 - 6:20]: I have heard that they have a hot spring. It's very iron rich. And I've just. Based on my chemical composition of my metal plating alone, I feel like it would be very nourishing. Nowhere near as nourishing as Mr. Klaus's robotic repair spa. Let's be honest. It was a spa. I felt I came out glowing. 

Jake [6:20 - 6:20]: Yeah. 

Gotfree [6:20 - 6:21]: Why? 

Jake [6:21 - 6:24]: Mainly from vacation. Every week's a vacation for you. 

Gotfree [6:24 - 6:37]: Every week's a vacation for me. Oh, please, sir. A vacation from my senses. Mainly a vacation from my sanity. 

Dallas [6:37 - 6:38]: Wait, you. 

Houston [6:38 - 6:39]: You have sanity? 

Gotfree [6:39 - 6:42]: Yeah, of course I have sanity. It's apparently on vacation. 

Jake [6:42 - 6:49]: She wasn't part of our little heart to heart or heart to processor there at the end. So he's not aware of your capabilities yet. 

Gotfree [6:49 - 6:56]: Excuse me. It was I. I led that heart. Heart at the end there, Mr. Winger. 

Jake [6:56 - 6:57]: But Houston wasn't there. He doesn't. 

Gotfree [6:58 - 6:58]: Houston. 

Jake [6:58 - 7:00]: Oh, he's not tight like we are. 

Gotfree [7:00 - 7:09]: Yes, that we. I wouldn't go that far, Ms. Swinger, but I wouldn't go that close either. 

Dallas [7:09 - 7:13]: Do robots dream of electric radstags with. 

Jake [7:13 - 7:17]: Two heads and all that's prominent? What am I saying? 

Dallas [7:18 - 7:22]: We're getting there. We're zeroing in on. We're working it up. 

Jake [7:22 - 7:24]: Summer break was rough, but yes, a. 

Gotfree [7:24 - 7:30]: Lovely vacation in the Poconos. If Martha's Vineyard hadn't been flattened, that would be my next bit. 

Jake [7:30 - 7:32]: Yeah. That's kind of a shame, isn't it? 

Gotfree [7:32 - 7:33]: Yeah. 

Houston [7:33 - 7:37]: Who would have thought that the nuclear bombs would have hit Lawyer Island? 

Gotfree [7:38 - 7:43]: You should see the grapes that grow in that place after the bomb dropped. Let me tell you. 

Jake [7:43 - 7:45]: Poor Delaware. 

Gotfree [7:46 - 7:47]: Borderline sentience. 

Houston [7:47 - 7:56]: Somehow, somehow we. We. We now have raisin plants. They just go straight to raisins. 

Dallas [7:57 - 7:58]: You leave them out. 

Gotfree [7:58 - 8:01]: Leaf flower, raisin. 

Jake [8:01 - 8:03]: Houston, how would you spend your summer break? 

Houston [8:04 - 8:31]: Well, you see, I have a nice little cottage in a beautiful place in upstate, in upstate New Hampshire. However, on my way to upstate New Hampshire, I passed this apocalyptic wasteland known as New Jersey, which, frankly, didn't change after the bombs were dropped at all. I went up to my cottage in New Jersey to try. 

Jake [8:31 - 8:33]: Your cottage is in New Jersey now? 

Houston [8:33 - 8:50]: Oh, my cottage in New Hampshire. And the reason I said New Jersey instead of New Hampshire is I got three words into my book, came to entire lost, went down to my old tavern and drank and drank and kept drinking. And then I woke up and found myself here. 

Dallas [8:50 - 8:51]: Wow. 

Jake [8:51 - 9:12]: You just, like, drunkenly teleported back to Michigan. Over. Over. Just, you know, not wanting to write your own book. That's awesome. Oh, no, no, it wasn't time travel. He was just gone for the weekend, you know, off to New Hampshire. What's left? 

Dallas [9:12 - 9:14]: Jake? Jacob, if we will. 

Jake [9:14 - 10:00]: You know, I guess if. How would I spend it now versus how I would have spent summer break in the vault? Summer break in the vault was a lot of cleaning. Like making sure my bed was made so tight that you could bounce a quarter off of it. That was always a big one. Otherwise Overseer Bauer would get the belt. But nowadays, you know, I spend my summer breaks a little differently. Sometimes I go and I put on my hazmat suit and I go for a swim in the irradiated river and I feel like a kid again. Other times I, you know, go and play duck, duck, two headed goose with the neighborhood kids, and it's really just. 

Gotfree [10:00 - 10:04]: Duck, duck, goose, goose, duck, duck, goose, goose. No, actually, the duck is the one. 

Dallas [10:04 - 10:05]: That has the Two heads. 

Gotfree [10:05 - 10:06]: Hence the duck. 

Klawzinski [10:06 - 10:06]: Duck. 

Jake [10:07 - 10:10]: You know, this makes so much more sense now. 

Dallas [10:10 - 10:13]: Thank you. It's actually one animal that has two duck heads and a goose head on it. 

Gotfree [10:13 - 10:14]: It's just a duck. 

Dallas [10:14 - 10:21]: Duck, goose. Gotta watch the fangs. Krista told me at one point that if she ever had a duck or. 

Gotfree [10:21 - 10:22]: Goose, she would name it Duck Duck. 

Jake [10:22 - 10:49]: And I just think that's how Jake. Jake is still trying to reclaim his childhood. And Jake's speaking on the third person now apparently. So yeah, that's how I spent my summer break is playing Duck, Duck, Goose and trying to avoid being irradiated in the river. We were just talking about how Game master Dallas feels like he's excluded. Game master Dallas, how would you spend your summer break as the game Master? 

Dallas [10:50 - 11:10]: I spend my summer breaks as you guys are walking forward, building the world willy nilly as you're going forward. And then just like I just like any regular person spend my summer breaks watching you guys, you know, just. Just peeking, just seeing what's going on just up there. 

Houston [11:10 - 11:13]: Up there. Eliminating the concept of free will. 

Dallas [11:13 - 11:14]: Yeah. 

Houston [11:14 - 11:17]: You know, guiding our every actions and our every move. 

Dallas [11:17 - 11:38]: I'm just. As you're walking, I'm like, I'm gonna drop a. Drop a duck, duck goose there. I'm gonna spring here while you guys. And then, then I just peek over that mountain and I just watch him. You know, when you guys are sleeping, I'm just sitting there watching. Just watching you. You know, like every normal person does. 

Jake [11:38 - 11:40]: Terrifying. I love it. 

Dallas [11:41 - 11:44]: Wait, are we talking about the game or real? 

Gotfree [11:44 - 11:45]: Never mind. 

Dallas [11:45 - 11:46]: It doesn't matter. 

Jake [11:46 - 11:50]: I wondered why the motion sensor lights kept kicking on in the middle of the night. 

Dallas [11:53 - 12:09]: So we last were together before Jake made the mistake of eating glowshrooms and going on a soul searching escapade. Inclaymation. 

Jake [12:09 - 12:12]: It was in Claymation. I thought I was the only one who was seeing that. 

Dallas [12:13 - 12:15]: I was building it. It was actually play doh. 

Jake [12:15 - 12:18]: So much better than the Muppets episode that we did. 

Dallas [12:19 - 12:20]: We haven't got there yet. 

Jake [12:21 - 12:23]: Oh, oh, my bad, my bad. 

Dallas [12:23 - 13:08]: We had. You guys had stumbled upon some death. A deathclaw who was eating a rad stag. It chased you guys, almost killed you. A super mutant behemoth came to your rescue who then invited you into his cave where you guys were catching up, relaxing a little bit, rubbing some oil on things. And oh, here we were. Here we are. And the last thing, a bit of information. As you guys were looking for a power core. You were talking to the resident behemoth and he said that he may have a lead on one. 

Jake [13:08 - 13:14]: What you just described still feels like a fever dream. But I am here for it. 

Dallas [13:14 - 13:48]: It was a fever dream. But yes. So we're all here in the collective fever dream together. You guys are in Mr. Claus's lab. And that is the name of the super mutant behemoth. And everyone is now sober, properly lubricated and fed. And you're gathered around kind of making a game plan and talking to Mr. Claus about your all's next moves. What he has in store for you as well. We are now all caught up. So. World is your oyster, Mr. Klaus. 

Gotfree [13:48 - 13:58]: You. You have a power core. That's what I. That's what I heard. You say you have one in your. Please, please, for the love of God, tell me you have a way to. 

Jake [13:58 - 14:00]: Get a power core. 

Klawzinski [14:00 - 14:06]: I have access to power core. I don't have one on me, but we can get one. 

Gotfree [14:06 - 14:13]: As in, we walk across your laboratory to that cabinet right there, and it's. It's just behind that door. Please. 

Houston [14:14 - 14:19]: Or we have to go to some unnecessary side quest which will involve some level of idiocy. 

Jake [14:19 - 14:25]: Hey, do you guys remember that there was a Winnebago that was chasing us? Like that was where this all started, too. Isn't that crazy? 

Gotfree [14:25 - 14:26]: It was. Sorry. 

Jake [14:26 - 14:28]: How do we get to the power core? 

Gotfree [14:29 - 14:30]: Yes, please do elaborate. 

Klawzinski [14:31 - 14:35]: Okay, so we have a few options. I have none here. 

Gotfree [14:35 - 14:36]: Oh, no. 

Houston [14:36 - 14:38]: Oh, great. It's a choose your own adventure story. 

Klawzinski [14:38 - 14:54]: We have some in the vault, but there should be one out in the wasteland. From our vault, we had experimental power cores that lasted longer than the regular power core. 

Gotfree [14:54 - 14:55]: Convenient. 

Jake [14:55 - 14:58]: And what was that in, if you don't mind me asking? 

Klawzinski [14:59 - 15:00]: It was in a robot. 

Jake [15:01 - 15:23]: Yeah, well, I've. I've come to realize that a lot of robots are worthy of our respect as persons in. Of themselves, so I don't feel like taking. Yeah, Godfrey, are you leaking oil again right there? Or is that a. Are you a single tier kind of guy? That's impressive. 

Klawzinski [15:23 - 15:25]: No, not on the carpet. 

Gotfree [15:25 - 15:29]: So. So I'm. Hang on, I'll retract it. 

Klawzinski [15:32 - 15:32]: Gross. 

Gotfree [15:32 - 15:34]: I'll turn around. 

Jake [15:34 - 15:41]: I don't. I don't feel good taking a power core out of an existing robot. 

Klawzinski [15:41 - 15:42]: It was stolen. 

Jake [15:42 - 15:44]: Stolen, you say? 

Klawzinski [15:44 - 15:44]: Yes. 

Gotfree [15:44 - 15:48]: Wait, the robot was stolen or the power core was stolen? 

Klawzinski [15:48 - 15:52]: Both, with. With research. From vault. 

Dallas [15:52 - 15:53]: Hmm. 

Jake [15:53 - 16:08]: All right, so wait, just to clarify. So the robot was stolen and data from the lab in the vault. But does the robot. Do we need to take the fusion core out of the robot or is There a spare with it? 

Klawzinski [16:09 - 16:13]: I need robot with plans pack. 

Jake [16:13 - 16:15]: Oh, so you just need it in. 

Klawzinski [16:15 - 16:42]: General, scientists do terrible experiment. Turn us all super mutant, but super mutant nice. We continue research, find way to maybe make all super mutant nice. But plan stolen. Taken from vault from head of security with robot in tow with secret inside. 

Gotfree [16:42 - 16:52]: Does this, does this robot have some sort of designation? Either some sort of VIN number barcode that would be appreciable on its visage? 

Klawzinski [16:53 - 16:59]: This robot was with head of security. It had a brain type body. 

Gotfree [16:59 - 17:12]: Oh, brain type body. What? I, I don't have anything like that in my memory banks. Please elaborate. What does it look like? 

Jake [17:12 - 17:22]: Would Jake, would Jake know what a robo brain is? He wouldn't know what he would he. I, I don't think so. Yeah, I don't think I would he. 

Dallas [17:22 - 17:39]: He would not. Because he's still fresh to the wasteland. Houston, Houston and Godfrey, I want you guys to make a roll for me. So we're gonna do an intelligence and a science roll. So that's gonna be six, seven, eight, nine for you, Houston. 

Houston [17:39 - 17:41]: Big money, big money, big money. 

Dallas [17:42 - 17:49]: Oh, you rolled a 19, which is horrible. And a 1 and a 1, which is perfect. 

Jake [17:49 - 17:55]: So they cancel each other entirely or do they? You get the worst case and the best case. 

Dallas [17:55 - 18:09]: Well, we. The 19 luckily wasn't a 20, so you don't like have a stroke while you're thinking about it. But you did roll a one, which means you get an extra action point added to your pool. Plus, best case scenario. 

Gotfree [18:12 - 18:15]: And I got a, an 11 and. 

Dallas [18:15 - 19:11]: A 15 and you needed a 10. So no dice. Two dice, but none in your favor. So it looks like all of this information is going to be housed within the soul, pancreas and brain. Houston. So as Houston is thinking about what he just heard, he hearkens back to things that he has seen whilst traveling the wasteland. And he remembers that a robo brain was a fairly large, kind of clunky. If you've ever watched the old, old Lost in space show, do you remember the like, wibbly wobbly armed robot? The danger, Will Robinson. 

Jake [19:11 - 19:13]: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 

Houston [19:13 - 19:16]: Would he like a giant, like vacuum cleaner? 

Dallas [19:16 - 19:34]: His arms looked like vacuum cleaner hoses. But the top of a robo brain is glass encased, like a glass case with a brain, a real human brain inside of it with a fairly large clunky chassis with, I think, is it treads, like almost like tank treads? 

Jake [19:34 - 19:43]: Yeah, like tank treads. They're generally. I'm gonna break the fourth wall. Jake doesn't Know this, but Alex does. It's almost like these are all the. 

Dallas [19:43 - 19:45]: Voices inside of Houston's head right now. 

Jake [19:45 - 20:00]: Right, right, right. These are the different memories. Houston's like, no wonder I'm so disturbed. It's almost like the size of a small, like Rubbermaid tote or a laundry hamper. About that big with a dome on top. 

Houston [20:00 - 20:03]: Oh, yeah, he would. This was in the show. 

Gotfree [20:03 - 20:06]: Yeah, yeah, yeah. 

Houston [20:08 - 20:14]: So, okay, I am. So, basically, it's a vacuum cleaner meets R2G2 meets a Cyberman. 

Jake [20:15 - 20:19]: Got it. Is, in theory, someone's brain. 

Houston [20:19 - 20:24]: Cyberman is a very similar concept in Doctor who. Yes. 

Dallas [20:24 - 20:25]: What? 

Houston [20:25 - 20:28]: Okay, yeah, maybe I should have just googled the. 

Jake [20:28 - 20:33]: This is more fun. Better radio, baby. 

Klawzinski [20:33 - 20:45]: Robo brain chassis, no brain. Instead, neural network with advanced fusion core to power. 

Houston [20:46 - 21:04]: Okay, so I have dealt with the robo brains in the past. Very, very disturbing creatures. You know, human brain kind of looks like basically if Godfrey went on an LSD trip. 

Gotfree [21:04 - 21:13]: Right, but he just said this one is not outfitted with an actual organic brain. This one is outfitted with a neural network. 

Dallas [21:13 - 21:14]: So. 

Klawzinski [21:14 - 21:17]: Outfitted with neural network that we called Philip. 

Houston [21:17 - 21:17]: Yes. 

Gotfree [21:17 - 21:21]: Oh, Philip. Great. You've assigned a name to him. 

Klawzinski [21:21 - 21:25]: Functional Intelligent Logic Interface Platform. 

Jake [21:27 - 21:33]: F I L. Oh, Philip. Oh, I got it. Yeah, it's. It's an acronym. That's clever. 

Klawzinski [21:33 - 21:40]: Yes. We just call all neural network interface computers and robots Philip. 

Jake [21:40 - 21:45]: Well, then how did Montague get a name? That's a really specific name. 

Klawzinski [21:45 - 21:50]: Those are not linked to neural network. Those are individual, Mr. Handy. 

Jake [21:50 - 21:51]: Oh, oh, I get. 

Houston [21:51 - 21:54]: Do you have a. Do you have a Phyllis? 

Jake [21:55 - 21:57]: He doesn't even know. 

Gotfree [21:57 - 22:00]: Isn't Phyllis the name of Crazy Carl? 

Dallas [22:00 - 22:05]: Yes. Remember anything from what we did before? 

Gotfree [22:07 - 22:18]: So, wait, wait, excuse me. So this very bot is named Philip, and we are going to go collect his fusion core to give to Phyllis. 

Klawzinski [22:19 - 22:21]: What is. What is Phyllis? 

Gotfree [22:22 - 22:44]: Phyllis is the entire reason we're looking for this blasted core. We have a friend who half of your gigantic children are currently in. New. No, New Detroit. Dustridge. They are currently in Dustridge, attempting to protect what we are trying to get this call. 4. 

Klawzinski [22:45 - 22:51]: You do all this for friend and his friend Phyllis. 

Gotfree [22:52 - 22:52]: Yes. 

Klawzinski [22:52 - 22:55]: Do you know friend? Long time. 

Jake [22:55 - 23:20]: Yeah, we. Crazy Carl has the robot. That's who we're getting a fusion core for. So, I mean, I don't feel right stealing a fusion core from another robot. That feels a little wrong. Tell us about the fusion core in the vault and maybe that would make more sense. I mean, maybe. Or is Philip a complete jerk? In which case, you know, I knew. 

Houston [23:20 - 23:22]: Of Philip back in the day. He was a complete jerk. 

Dallas [23:22 - 23:29]: Blesinski looks. He furrows his brow and he goes. And he sits down on his bed. 

Jake [23:30 - 23:34]: Which I did replace the sheets on. That was my first chore of the day. 

Dallas [23:34 - 23:37]: That's true. On the freshly laundered sheets. 

Klawzinski [23:38 - 23:42]: Can you describe this crazy Carl? 

Jake [23:42 - 24:06]: Well, he's like. He's about this tall and he's got a big bushy beard. He kind of has, like a slouch, like, little on the back. He's missing a tooth. Right here. Right, right there. I don't know, guys. How else would you describe Carl? 

Houston [24:06 - 24:08]: He has looser bolts than Godfrey. 

Jake [24:08 - 24:10]: Godfrey. How would you describe him? 

Gotfree [24:10 - 24:19]: How would I describe Carl? Well, not all of the lights are on in the attic. 

Jake [24:20 - 24:26]: Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's not the brightest crayon in the tool shed. You know what I mean? 

Gotfree [24:26 - 24:30]: Not the brightest crayon in the tool shed. 

Jake [24:30 - 24:31]: That's called a malaproprism. 

Gotfree [24:32 - 24:46]: Ironically, Master Winger, that makes complete and total sense in describing Karl. But he has a good heart. I will say he has a good heart. And his love and affection and loyalty for Phyllis is what honestly has driven us. 

Jake [24:46 - 24:47]: It's admirable. 

Gotfree [24:48 - 24:50]: Well, it's admirable and it's the reason we're here. 

Klawzinski [24:50 - 24:52]: What does Phyllis look like? 

Jake [24:52 - 25:25]: Well, she's about yay tall, and she's got a little thing on her back that goes. And then. Oh, you know what? They kind of go together, don't they? She's blue. Like, like really cool powder blue. And she's got big, like, noodle arms and a little spinny thing inside a dome on her head. And she's got noodle, like, tubey legs that are real flat and stumpy. Yeah, that's. That's what Phyllis looks like. But she's not working right now, so her little spinny thing isn't spinning, if. 

Gotfree [25:25 - 25:26]: You know what I mean. 

Klawzinski [25:26 - 25:39]: Security manager. Very dangerous man leave with secrets inside of robot named Philip. Head of security name Carlos Mendoza. 

Jake [25:41 - 25:42]: What? 

Gotfree [25:43 - 25:44]: What. 

Jake [25:46 - 25:55]: Game Master Dallas? You took the time to make your summer break and ruin our world? Is that what's about to happen? Did we just go on a. 

Gotfree [25:55 - 25:56]: Wait. 

Houston [25:56 - 25:56]: When? 

Gotfree [25:56 - 26:01]: Okay, sorry, sorry, sorry. When did he leave the vault? 

Klawzinski [26:01 - 26:05]: He revolts. Approximately less than one year ago. 

Gotfree [26:06 - 26:10]: Master Winger, how long has Karl been on the outskirts of Dustridge? 

Jake [26:10 - 26:14]: I mean, I've only been in Dustridge for a year. 

Gotfree [26:14 - 26:18]: Houston, how long has Carl been on the outside of Dostridge? 

Jake [26:20 - 26:20]: A year. 

Gotfree [26:20 - 26:24]: Wait, no, make him roll for intelligence. 

Houston [26:24 - 26:24]: Oh. 

Dallas [26:24 - 26:28]: Oh, yeah. 

Houston [26:28 - 26:29]: Question. 

Jake [26:29 - 26:29]: Yes. 

Houston [26:29 - 26:37]: I'm not Following Carlos Mendo. So we're just saying that Carlos is. Is care. 

Jake [26:37 - 26:39]: Is crazy Carl Phil, maybe. 

Gotfree [26:39 - 26:40]: Well, we're finding that out. 

Jake [26:40 - 26:43]: We're gonna find out. Oh, boy. 

Gotfree [26:43 - 26:48]: Master Winger, how long has Carl been on the outskirts of Dusttale? 

Jake [26:48 - 26:50]: I'm trying to remember. 

Dallas [26:52 - 27:08]: Let's give a roll there, Mr. Winger. No. Okay, so I got intelligence and let's pair that with survival. So your intelligence is a seven, survival's a three. 

Jake [27:09 - 27:19]: I need a ten. So I rolled a 16 and a. A seven. 

Dallas [27:20 - 27:21]: There we go. You made it in the boat. 

Jake [27:22 - 27:40]: So I guess I've been there a year. I know that Randy has talked about all the different people in town, I guess. How long has it been? And I go into my memory bank and game master Dallas plants the memory of Randall at some point, saying. 

Dallas [27:44 - 27:49]: Yeah, he. He's been here for about 10, 11 months. 

Jake [27:52 - 27:56]: Oh, no, Carl's only been in town like 10 or 11 months. 

Gotfree [27:56 - 27:59]: Son of a One eyed socket wrench. 

Jake [28:00 - 28:26]: I mean, no, I mean he's crazy. He's crazy. He only knows how to like boil a liquid and make hooch in a bathtub. There's no way he. He's a scientist. I mean, that's not science, is it? That's just. Oh, I guess that is kind of science. Uh, you know what? You asked us what Carl looked like. What did Karl Carlos look like, Mr. Claus? 

Klawzinski [28:26 - 28:34]: Carlos generally very clean shaven, about yay high. He has like a whoop on his back. 

Jake [28:34 - 28:39]: Like a whoop, whoop. I'm glad it's stuck. 

Klawzinski [28:40 - 28:49]: From training exercise. He has scar over left eye. From fight in vault. He has white hair. 

Jake [28:49 - 28:53]: Yeah, but was he missing this tooth right here? Was he missing this tooth right there? 

Klawzinski [28:53 - 28:56]: He was missing, yes. From bathtub accident. 

Jake [28:56 - 28:59]: From a bathtub accident. That's awful. 

Klawzinski [28:59 - 29:03]: Yes, terrible. He whistles sometimes when talk. 

Gotfree [29:03 - 29:04]: Oh my. 

Houston [29:04 - 29:07]: Dallas, have you been watching Gravity Falls? 

Dallas [29:07 - 29:10]: I have not. Is that a thing? Is this a thing in Gravity Falls? 

Houston [29:11 - 29:17]: This crazy Carl? This great. This is a thing in Gravity Falls. 

Jake [29:18 - 29:35]: That's why I've been picturing him. Because I thought that's what we were doing. I thought we were doing the gravity and it's like a thing and he's like, really? I thought you were doing that. 

Houston [29:35 - 29:43]: And he was a sci. He was a scientist that went crazy because he created a memory machine that he's at. 

Jake [29:43 - 29:46]: I'm sorry, you weren't doing this, Dallas. That's incredible. 

Dallas [29:46 - 29:47]: No. 

Jake [29:47 - 29:52]: Have you even seen Gravity Falls? It's like Twin Peaks or X Files for Children. 

Dallas [29:52 - 30:16]: Okay, so this is. This is what's wild? Wild. We want. We watched the very, very first episode tonight for the very, very first time, and I fell asleep halfway through because I was getting tired. I knew we were doing this. I Scouts honor first episode tonight because it showed up in the, like, Halloween. Like, you would like this for Halloween stuff. 

Jake [30:16 - 30:16]: This is. 

Dallas [30:16 - 30:36]: And so I was like, let's watch it. And we're in. Because we're like. I don't even know like, what the vibe is of this. Is it, like spongebob Ish? What is it? So we're like, let's just watch it because we've never seen it. First episode, I fell asleep halfway through because I was like, I need to take a power nap before we start recording. 

Jake [30:37 - 30:41]: I cannot believe what's happening here. So first we get. 

Dallas [30:41 - 30:47]: But I don't remember any sort of. Carl. I remember there's, like, a great uncle. Is it a great uncle? Is that who it is? 

Houston [30:47 - 30:49]: Grunkle, grunkle, grunkle. 

Jake [30:50 - 30:53]: We won't spoil anything for you because it's incredible, but okay. 

Houston [30:53 - 30:55]: Oh, it's one of the finest cartoons ever made. 

Dallas [30:55 - 30:57]: Is it gnomes? Is that. Was that the thing? 

Houston [30:58 - 30:59]: Yeah, zombie gnomes. 

Jake [30:59 - 31:15]: So timeout. You mean to tell me that crazy Carl could be Carlos Mendoza, who is a scientist from Vault, whatever you were from, And Phyllis could be Philip. Oh, my God. 

Klawzinski [31:15 - 31:20]: Could be Carlos. No, Scientist Carlos. Head of security. 

Gotfree [31:20 - 31:41]: So wait a minute, Master class. I'm. I'm sorry. I. My processors are a couple generations old, so we have been searching for a power gore for this robot. Your lead on a power core has led us back to this robot. 

Klawzinski [31:42 - 31:44]: Sounds like it. 

Gotfree [31:44 - 31:53]: The power core that you have for us is in the robot that we are trying to find power core for Mr. Claus. 

Houston [31:53 - 31:54]: He doesn't. 

Gotfree [31:55 - 31:58]: She doesn't. I'm so confused. Phyllis does not have one. 

Jake [31:59 - 31:59]: Why would. 

Dallas [31:59 - 31:59]: Why. 

Jake [31:59 - 32:17]: All right, timeout. Why would we keep saying time out but we've never had time in, by the way? Time in? Why would Carl send us into the wasteland like he wants to kill us or something? That's crazy talk. Oh. Oh. 

Houston [32:17 - 32:23]: It's almost like we have a vindictive force out there manipulating these events. 

Jake [32:23 - 32:29]: No, I heard what I was saying. As I was saying it. Oh, Officer Mendoza. 

Klawzinski [32:29 - 32:32]: Very manipulative, very dangerous. 

Jake [32:32 - 33:01]: Uh, so Carl could be Carlos, Phyllis could be Philip, and he is a manipulator from a vault. I've dealt with this a time or two in the past. Is there any chance that Carlos was working with a group that wanted to eat people just. Just by you know, happenstance. 

Klawzinski [33:01 - 33:07]: Carlos generally vegetarian. So hard to say what happened after Lee vault. 

Houston [33:07 - 33:13]: Are we talking like plant vegetarian or vampire vegetarian? Because those are very different things. 

Klawzinski [33:13 - 33:15]: Radiated plant vegetarian. 

Jake [33:15 - 33:17]: I'm very glad we ran into you. 

Houston [33:17 - 33:18]: Okay. 

Jake [33:18 - 33:21]: I'm glad. We know the boys now. And they are our friends. 

Houston [33:22 - 33:25]: That being said, can we stay here forever? 

Jake [33:25 - 33:34]: Yeah. You know what? Game over. This the show big red button will now just be mushroom trips in the workshop. 

Klawzinski [33:34 - 33:39]: I have. I have more important thing to tell you about this story. 

Jake [33:40 - 33:41]: More important. 

Klawzinski [33:41 - 34:08]: Carlos head of security. Carlos have access to computer mainframe that overseer not have. I find open computer terminal. Carlos was actively talking to other vaults via underground vault network. He was giving these plans to someone who have requested them through this network. 

Gotfree [34:08 - 34:14]: Did. Did you happen to see where. Which vault it was coming from? 

Klawzinski [34:14 - 34:15]: It is unclear. 

Gotfree [34:16 - 34:27]: What is the here, master? Mr. Kloss is Carlos. He's very manipulative. But is he dangerous? Is he actually physically dangerous? 

Klawzinski [34:27 - 34:35]: Yes. Carlos Mendoza trained in the most brutal combat techniques known to anyone involved. 

Gotfree [34:35 - 34:43]: Because we may have. We may have sent some of your proverbial children to protect him. 

Jake [34:43 - 34:46]: I do totally forgot about that. 

Klawzinski [34:47 - 34:53]: Oh, you send my boys into danger with Mr. Mendoza? 

Jake [34:53 - 34:55]: Uh, yeah. 

Houston [34:55 - 34:59]: We didn't know that he was Mr. Mendoza. 

Jake [34:59 - 35:19]: We thought he's Carl. And Phyllis was Phyllis. And she doesn't have a power core. Oh, no. All right, Mr. Kloss. What do we do? Do we all just go confront him or. Why am I asking you? I'm in. We're in charge of this game, not Dallas. 

Dallas [35:20 - 35:23]: What do you. What's the. What's the plan here? What's the play? 

Jake [35:23 - 35:29]: I. Can. Can one of us be able to roll for perception to see if Mr. Claus would be lying to us? 

Dallas [35:30 - 35:32]: Yeah. You can do that? We could do. 

Jake [35:32 - 35:39]: I don't know why. I don't know why he would be. But like, I almost want to. 

Dallas [35:39 - 35:40]: You rolling the. 

Gotfree [35:40 - 35:43]: I don't trust everybody. Everyone's always gaslighting me. 

Jake [35:43 - 35:43]: Yeah. 

Gotfree [35:43 - 35:44]: Would make more sense for you to roll. 

Jake [35:45 - 36:16]: You know, here's the thing. And I'm so. I'm thinking this to myself. I says to myself, self, I don't trust anybody. And this guy that we just met is now telling us that a person I've known for the past year is a double agent who's secretly super killer. And I've never seen this guy hurt a fly. So I'm not so sure I believe Klaus all the way. I would like to roll to see if Klaus is lying. Game master. 

Dallas [36:16 - 36:23]: Okay. Yeah. So I want you to roll a perception and survival, which for you is an 8. 

Jake [36:23 - 36:33]: Okay. Okay, here we go. I'm rolling 8 12. That's not good enough. 

Dallas [36:33 - 36:33]: Nope. 

Jake [36:33 - 36:41]: Rolling a. Oh, it's an. It is an 8. And it didn't land in the stupid thing. 

Dallas [36:41 - 36:44]: Doesn't count if it doesn't land in the box. 

Jake [36:46 - 36:48]: Oh, I gotta roll it again. 

Dallas [36:48 - 36:52]: You said it rolled. I was like, I didn't see anything. You're. 

Jake [36:54 - 36:55]: No. 

Dallas [36:55 - 36:57]: Oh, there we go. 

Jake [36:57 - 37:07]: Oh, Okay. I do not trust him. Game master. Is he telling me the truth or does he believe what he is telling me? I guess is the better question. 

Gotfree [37:08 - 37:11]: Mr. Claus has been a very trustworthy individual. 

Dallas [37:11 - 37:12]: I would say yes, he saved our. 

Jake [37:12 - 37:22]: Lives, but he could believe what he's telling us and it not be true. But does he believe what he is telling us to be true? 

Dallas [37:22 - 37:37]: He does. And also Mr. Mendoza is from the vault. Mr. Claus is from. Kleczynski is from the vault. And also the boys are from the vault. So you could even ask them if they know anything to help corroborate. 

Jake [37:37 - 38:32]: So I've spent my years in the vault knowing that I'm being gaslit, slowly being able to perceive little imperceptible. Like they had these recordings, these old tele dramas called Lie to Me. It was a really old show from before the war. And I watched that and I started learning all of these like body micro expressions. And so the way Claus is talking, I'm gonna ask him again and I'm just gonna read his expressions and I'll be able to tell for sure. So like Mr. Claus, this is a lot for us to process right now. Like you're telling us that a friend we've known for a very long time is somehow this trained killer and scientist. Are you sure that this is the same person and same robot in your mind? 

Klawzinski [38:32 - 38:47]: It is too close for it not to be same Philip, Phyllis, Carl, Carlos, same type of robot? I would hope not. But it sounds a little too close to not be same man. 

Jake [38:48 - 38:52]: I'm gonna look at Godfrey in Houston. I think he's telling the truth, guys. 

Gotfree [38:53 - 39:03]: Oh, that's what you were doing when you walked up to him and you were observing him from three inches away. I could have told you that his heart rate didn't change one bit. 

Jake [39:03 - 39:04]: You could have done that this whole time? 

Klawzinski [39:04 - 39:09]: I did find it weird that you got close to me, but so as. 

Jake [39:09 - 39:13]: The self appointed leader right now, because I am clearly the smartest of the bosses. 

Gotfree [39:13 - 39:16]: Ah, yes, yes. Keep telling yourself that. 

Jake [39:16 - 39:28]: We have a few different options. So first we could. We gotta go rescue the boys because clearly they would be the ones in danger that we sent to go protect Carl. 

Gotfree [39:28 - 39:37]: Selfishly, I need more poetry. We've got to rescue Stompy. Was it Stompy? 

Jake [39:37 - 39:38]: Stompy, yeah. 

Gotfree [39:38 - 39:40]: Yeah, we've got to rescue Stompy. 

Jake [39:40 - 40:00]: The other option is we go to the vault, we try and find as many tools and stuff as possible and then go to Carl. Or third option, we. We just go to New Detroit with everybody else. Or, well, I guess that would leave Crazy Carl in the mix. So we have two options. 

Gotfree [40:00 - 40:03]: Yes, but apparently he's a manipulative psychopath. 

Jake [40:03 - 40:05]: Well, we didn't know that. 

Gotfree [40:06 - 40:06]: Okay. 

Jake [40:06 - 40:09]: All right, so that leaves us with two options, I guess. 

Dallas [40:09 - 40:31]: As the. The voice in the ether here, I do also want to remind you guys, the reason why Carl is by himself is because there is a horde of cultist cannibals also descending from the north that sometimes you guys forget about, even though they are going to eat everyone's faces off. No big deal. 

Houston [40:34 - 40:56]: Mr. Kleczynski, if we were to go save stop being the gang, you be willing to come with us because there's a band of murderous cannibals who are ready to eat our faces. And you seem like the kind of person we need. And to face off against a band of murderous cannibals, do we need him. 

Gotfree [40:56 - 41:00]: For morale or for the muscly sinew and those gigantic claws? 

Jake [41:00 - 41:01]: Yes, both. 

Gotfree [41:01 - 41:02]: Both. 

Houston [41:02 - 41:02]: Yes. 

Gotfree [41:02 - 41:04]: Yes, both. 

Houston [41:04 - 41:04]: Yes. 

Klawzinski [41:04 - 41:18]: Yeah, I. I am big. Yes. But I do not think that me by myself will be able to handle your cannibal problem alone. 

Houston [41:18 - 41:23]: Do you have any extra, like, weapons that we can use? 

Klawzinski [41:23 - 41:33]: I do have limited toys in the vault that I could bring, but I only have very few not willing to part with them for nothing. 

Jake [41:33 - 41:52]: So here's what we need to figure out, guys. Breaking the fourth wall or moving back into the game world. We've got to figure out, do we go to Carl, who is now a bad guy, allegedly, or do we want to go at the vault? What do you guys think? 

Houston [41:52 - 41:53]: Hey. 

Dallas [41:53 - 41:57]: Oh, I need somebody to give me a roll. 

Gotfree [41:57 - 41:59]: I will roll. 

Dallas [41:59 - 42:04]: Godfrey, you're going to roll an intelligence. And a lock pick. 

Jake [42:04 - 42:06]: And a lock pick. 

Dallas [42:06 - 42:06]: Yep. 

Jake [42:06 - 42:07]: All right, what does he need? 

Dallas [42:07 - 42:10]: He actually has a really high lock pick skill. So. Seven. 

Gotfree [42:10 - 42:12]: Well, of course I do. I'm a robot. 

Jake [42:12 - 42:14]: 1313. 

Dallas [42:17 - 42:20]: Go ahead and roll another one. Just, just for the funsies. 

Gotfree [42:20 - 42:36]: Hang on, hang on. And I. I like over to the red stag stall and I get some of the bailing twine tie it around my visage and let it drink down over my shoulders. Take one pincer arm and flip it off my shoulder like a scarf. 

Jake [42:36 - 42:38]: That was amazing. Amazing. 

Gotfree [42:38 - 42:39]: And I will roll again. 

Jake [42:40 - 42:42]: The hair flip. 

Gotfree [42:42 - 42:45]: And I'm wondering how. 

Jake [42:46 - 42:51]: How you get the best and the worst case scenario in one. How? 

Gotfree [42:52 - 42:57]: Just culture the bailing twine. And I'm slowly strangling myself. Help me. 

Klawzinski [42:57 - 42:58]: Help. 

Gotfree [42:59 - 43:00]: Help me. 

Jake [43:02 - 43:05]: What do you eat? Even do that? He had a perfect. 

Gotfree [43:05 - 43:09]: What do I. Yeah. What happens there? Did we just split? 

Dallas [43:09 - 43:29]: So did we just divide zero by zero? We decided to get sassy and go get rope and put it on your head and flip does fire on your flamethrower. And you now have a flaming halo over your dome. And you do lose one health point. 

Jake [43:29 - 43:30]: Godfrey, you're on fire. 

Gotfree [43:30 - 43:31]: Yes, I know. 

Jake [43:31 - 43:32]: I'm. 

Gotfree [43:32 - 43:33]: I'm. I'm amazed. 

Houston [43:33 - 43:34]: Oh, good Lord. 

Gotfree [43:34 - 43:35]: I'm on fire. 

Jake [43:36 - 43:39]: Literally on fire. I didn't mean, like, figuratively. You're the best. 

Houston [43:39 - 43:44]: This body's on fire. This body's on fire. 

Dallas [43:45 - 43:52]: So it does leave scorch marks on your finely polished dome. Your newly polished dome. 

Gotfree [43:53 - 43:55]: I just got clean. 

Dallas [43:57 - 44:00]: So should I have. 

Gotfree [44:01 - 44:07]: Should I not have the option to just stop? They rolled a perfect score. 

Dallas [44:07 - 44:15]: It's called a 2D20 because you roll a 2D's and one of your D's was nuts. 

Gotfree [44:15 - 44:17]: It was nuts. 

Dallas [44:18 - 44:50]: Nuts rolls over here. So your one does. Does give you good information, though. So tapping into your data banks, and as you were kind of taking in your cleaning and chit chatting with the other robots, you learned the systems and the type of vault security that this vault has. And you know that this vault is going to be impossible to get into without the Overseer's clearance. 

Jake [44:50 - 44:51]: Oh. 

Dallas [44:51 - 44:56]: So you cannot go to the vault and get in without Overseer Kleczynski going with you. 

Jake [44:57 - 45:06]: Huh? All right. Godfrey is going to have to present that information to us, though, because Houston and I are not inside his brain right now. So we don't know that. Godfrey. 

Gotfree [45:07 - 45:37]: Yes, sorry, I. What is the phrase? Rock place. Hard. Hard place. That's where we are currently so accessing. I mean, accessing the information that I have before my visage got on fire. It does appear that we cannot get into the vault without the Overseer vis a vis, Mr. Klaus. 

Jake [45:37 - 45:52]: So we have to either convince Klaus to go with us into the vault, maybe get some weapons to then maybe make it back to. Because the vault is farther away from here. 

Gotfree [45:52 - 45:53]: Yes. 

Jake [45:53 - 46:04]: And then we would have to then make it back here to then make it back to Dustridge to protect the boys now from Karl and the advancing horde. 

Gotfree [46:04 - 46:36]: Well, I'm sorry, what. What happened to the red coated one? Where's Lady Grey? And then Montague comes over. Oh yes. Doing Master Winger's well fit. She was seen throwing up two of her middle appendages on both of her arms and she stormed out. So I don't think think she's going to be of any sort of help to you. 

Jake [46:37 - 46:41]: Or we just ignore that Lady Gray ever existed. 

Gotfree [46:41 - 46:41]: Or we just. 

Dallas [46:42 - 46:42]: We just ignore. 

Gotfree [46:42 - 46:47]: Well, I mean like she's like single handedly ripped the head off of the. 

Jake [46:47 - 46:53]: Throwing up double middle fingers and just walking out is more apropos than you know, buddy. 

Dallas [46:55 - 46:56]: She also drunk too. 

Houston [46:57 - 47:00]: She did it layers upon layers here. 

Jake [47:00 - 47:11]: With fucking onion grabs collar, tugs more than twice, wraps the bailing twine and you know, like, thanks for that. 

Dallas [47:11 - 47:12]: That was settled. 

Jake [47:12 - 47:16]: Montague. Yeah. Lady Grey. Who? I've never heard that name before. 

Houston [47:16 - 47:22]: What was the name? Brandanowitz in Parks and Rec that left after season two and never heard from again. 

Dallas [47:22 - 47:26]: Yes, that's Lady Grey. Okay, well, she's dead now. 

Gotfree [47:30 - 47:35]: Okay, I'm sorry. So what would be the point of going to the vault now? 

Jake [47:35 - 47:40]: Uh, friendship. Exploration. 

Gotfree [47:41 - 47:46]: Friendship. Bravery. There are more important things. Weapons. 

Jake [47:46 - 47:54]: Well, we thought we were doing the friendship thing right with Karl and that did not apparently go well at all. 

Gotfree [47:54 - 48:02]: I agree. The coincidence here is uncanny. You've known him for almost a year. 

Jake [48:03 - 48:04]: You think you know a guy. 

Gotfree [48:04 - 48:12]: You know at any point, did you. Did you happen to perceive any lucidity in his. 

Jake [48:12 - 48:20]: Did I ever perceive any lucidity? Game master. Did I ever perceive that Carl, you. 

Dallas [48:20 - 48:25]: Might have perceived with a speech check. 

Jake [48:25 - 48:26]: With a speech check. 

Dallas [48:26 - 48:29]: Perception and a speech. 

Jake [48:29 - 48:41]: Yes. Okay, so I have a 5 in perception and a 5 in speech. So I need a 10 or higher to try and remember 12 and a 1. 

Dallas [48:41 - 48:43]: What is with all these ones? 

Jake [48:43 - 49:03]: I don't know. All right, I go back into my little memory bank again. I try and remember conversation with Carl. I mean Carl, I just feel like you're over simplifying raising Brahmin. Like I'm very dumb. I think. How do you manage it? 

Speaker F [49:03 - 49:19]: Two buckets of rad roach steaks, six things of tomato blended in with all those rad steaks. Plus you add a little bit of radwater to it and you do just fine, really. But you gotta feed each head separately. 

Dallas [49:19 - 49:23]: But you gotta watch out though because they bite. 

Jake [49:25 - 49:30]: Did you. Do you need to clear your throat or something? That was weird. Your voice just like. 

Speaker F [49:30 - 49:33]: Yeah, sorry. That toilet wine, sometimes it just. 

Jake [49:33 - 49:36]: It scratches the throat, you know what I'm saying? 

Speaker F [49:36 - 49:40]: Yeah, it don't go down smooth. And it don't come out smooth either. 

Jake [49:43 - 50:17]: Well, I'll tell you what. This conversation was so normal that I'll probably forget it forever because it doesn't have any bearing on my life. I'll see you later, Carl. You know, now that you mention it, there were moments here or there, that he did seem more like with it than others. Like it was like an act. Houston, do you have any memories of him being like, smart? 

Dallas [50:17 - 50:22]: He's gonna roll perception and speech as well, correct? 

Jake [50:22 - 50:23]: Yeah. 

Dallas [50:23 - 50:42]: Okay, buckle up because you got a two in perception and a one in speech. You need a three or below. So let's go ahead and see what these rolls give us. Oh, a 13 and a 6. Fantastic. 

Houston [50:42 - 50:55]: All right, let me think. You know, I think I recall this one time while you're clean here. 

Speaker F [50:58 - 51:05]: Hey there, buddy. Just cause I make it in a toilet. Don't eat, you have to drink the whole thing. You don't got to drink a whole toilet's worth. 

Gotfree [51:06 - 51:06]: Yeah. 

Jake [51:06 - 51:06]: Yes. 

Speaker F [51:06 - 51:10]: You're so sloshed out that you ain't going to remember nothing, you dummy. 

Dallas [51:11 - 51:12]: Remember what? 

Speaker F [51:12 - 51:24]: You're not even going to remember that my name is Carlos Mendoza and that I've got secrets that the whole vault system needs to know. And I'm going to be letting out of here soon. 

Houston [51:25 - 51:43]: What does it tell you, Carl? You're my only friend. I think I just. I felt a burning sensation. I think I just peed on your couch. 

Speaker F [51:43 - 51:45]: Don't you pee on my couch. 

Houston [51:47 - 51:50]: No, no, no, I got nothing. 

Jake [51:50 - 52:19]: No. That's a shame. Well, I do remember. I do. All right, so Carl is definitely Carlos, which is not good. And going to the vault seems like it's probably a waste of time. So the four of us are heading right back to Dustridge. Yay. 

Dallas [52:21 - 52:27]: Do you want anything from Mr. Claus or do you want. 

Jake [52:27 - 52:28]: Yes. 

Dallas [52:29 - 52:29]: Bye. Bye. 

Jake [52:29 - 52:39]: Moral support, physical support, weapons. Yes, all of the above also. Are Jeremy and Grumbly going with us? 

Dallas [52:40 - 52:43]: You haven't asked anybody, so I don't know. 

Jake [52:43 - 52:47]: Oh, yeah. We're just gonna get up and they. 

Gotfree [52:47 - 52:49]: Come with us too, Please. 

Houston [52:49 - 52:50]: Yes, please. 

Dallas [52:50 - 52:54]: So, would you like to ask the group, um. 

Jake [52:54 - 52:55]: Jeremy. 

Gotfree [52:56 - 53:05]: Jeremy, you know how we sent your brothers to protect Crazy Carl? 

Klawzinski [53:06 - 53:11]: Yes. Me kind of worried now that me know it might be Mr. Mendoza. 

Gotfree [53:12 - 53:26]: Yes, we are too. I'm just so, so worried. You can hear the distress. I can tell you can hear the distress in my. In my. So would you please come with us and bring your muscles. 

Jake [53:26 - 53:29]: But also we have to protect your brothers. 

Gotfree [53:29 - 53:46]: So yes, come with us to protect your brothers and us. Please. Look at these arms. I'm so. I'm so fragile. Please. I would crumple like a piece of tinfoil in the wind if it was left up to me. 

Houston [53:46 - 53:49]: And if I'm honest, I'm basically beef jerky at this point. 

Gotfree [53:49 - 54:05]: Yes, yes, yes. Sweet baby rays. We got it. Okay. Me, I'm fragile, yes. Me, protect me. I have a compact form. I can attach straps. You can carry me on your back if you want to. 

Dallas [54:06 - 54:21]: Jeremy and the other boys sheepishly kind of look up at Mr. Claus at your request because they look worried, scared and concern as much as a super mutant can. 

Jake [54:21 - 54:29]: I mean, same. The three of us are not exactly rip roaring with excitement. And get back to Carl. 

Klawzinski [54:29 - 54:45]: Right, Mr. Claus, what you think? What should we do? I think that you boys need to go with those three things and go and save the rest of the boys from Mr. Mendoza. 

Dallas [54:45 - 54:52]: Is there anything that you guys would like to ask of Mr. Claus though before you leave the cave? 

Jake [54:52 - 54:54]: I have so many questions. 

Houston [54:54 - 54:54]: Yes. 

Gotfree [54:54 - 54:55]: Can we have weapons? 

Dallas [54:59 - 55:06]: I'm going to need Godfrey to. I need you to roll a riz and a speech check. 

Gotfree [55:07 - 55:08]: Let me. 

Dallas [55:08 - 55:17]: So you got a five in charisma and you have a one in speech. Boo. 

Jake [55:17 - 55:18]: Fifteen. 

Dallas [55:21 - 55:21]: Yeah. 

Jake [55:23 - 55:25]: Oh, let's hear what you. 

Gotfree [55:25 - 55:30]: Please, please, can we have weapons? Please just. 

Klawzinski [55:30 - 55:36]: I don't have any guns on me right now. They're all in the vault. 

Gotfree [55:36 - 55:40]: Yes, I know. We've heard the whole pacifist story this entire time. 

Dallas [55:40 - 55:44]: Would anybody else like to maybe say a pretty please? 

Houston [55:46 - 55:48]: I would like. I would like to say pretty please. 

Dallas [55:49 - 55:54]: Here we go. Okay, so Houston has a 10 in charisma. 

Jake [55:55 - 56:06]: Oh, that's right. Oh, that's not right. Got a. Oh, he got a three and a 19. Hey, but a three, that's a winner. 

Dallas [56:06 - 56:08]: Winner, chicken dinner is the way to be. 

Houston [56:08 - 56:26]: Mr. Claus, you are just so lovely. You've been so good to us. You're so good to us right now. Could we please. We don't have a chance without big, big weapons. Will you please help us? 

Klawzinski [56:27 - 56:59]: Since you boys have been so good to my boys. You guys have been good little boys. I will see what I can scrounge up and bring to help. But first I need you to rescue my boys and make sure they're okay. We meet at Harrison in two night times and reconvene. You bring my boys safe, I bring you weapons and help you with your Cannibal problem. Deal. 

Jake [56:59 - 56:59]: All right. 

Gotfree [57:00 - 57:00]: Deal. 

Jake [57:00 - 57:07]: Yes. Sounds like a deal. Now, before we go our separate ways, I also have a question for Mr. Kloss. 

Klawzinski [57:07 - 57:08]: Yes. 

Jake [57:08 - 57:35]: I am curious about Mr. Mendoza's past and why he rebelled and left. Because that may play into how we address Carl. We may be able to convince him that we're not a threat and then sneak attack him at the very end. Can you tell me more about Carlos and like what he what like what makes him tick? 

Klawzinski [57:35 - 57:40]: Carlos was very professional. Carlos never get close to anyone. 

Jake [57:40 - 57:41]: Do I have to roll for it? 

Klawzinski [57:42 - 57:46]: Yes. I just kept going willy nilly. Ha ha ha. 

Dallas [57:47 - 58:00]: That really took a lot out of me on that one. Yes. Go ahead. And we're going to roll. No, it wasn't you. It's being Mr. Claus for extended periods of time. I'm gonna need you to roll a charisma. 

Jake [58:00 - 58:01]: Okay. 

Dallas [58:01 - 58:03]: And a speech. 

Jake [58:03 - 58:12]: Okay, so I have a seven and a five. So that's 12 or lower. Here we go. I'm rolling a seven. 

Dallas [58:13 - 58:14]: Ooh, give me one more. 

Jake [58:14 - 58:19]: Oh no. I rolled a 12. 

Dallas [58:19 - 58:20]: Bounced around all over. 

Jake [58:20 - 58:32]: Heck yeah. I got two wins there. All right, so what can you tell us about Carlos? What are his. What makes him tick and what should we be concerned about with him? 

Klawzinski [58:32 - 59:09]: Carlos very professional. Carlos not get close to anyone involved because Carlos job was security only. Carlos was one of many security managers frozen only unthawed when next one die. He was current head of security. Carlos is trained in hand to hand combat and is very deadly with a stick or any sort of hand to hand weapon at close range. Also very competent in handguns and power energy weapons as he was there to defend us. 

Houston [59:09 - 59:11]: So basically he'll kill us all. 

Jake [59:11 - 59:15]: Energy weapons, hand to hand and small guns. So basically. 

Dallas [59:15 - 59:17]: Oh, we're dead. 

Jake [59:18 - 59:22]: Oh, and by the way, we have cannibals chasing us too. 

Klawzinski [59:22 - 59:25]: Carlos is deaf in his left ear. 

Jake [59:25 - 59:29]: Really? In his left ear? 

Klawzinski [59:29 - 59:35]: Yes. And severe damage to his right ear. He mostly get by by reading lips. 

Jake [59:35 - 59:39]: Interesting. That is good to know. 

Klawzinski [59:39 - 59:42]: Anything else you need from me before we leave? 

Jake [59:42 - 59:43]: Are we missing something big here? 

Dallas [59:44 - 59:47]: Are you? Because I will not tell you until you run off that cliff. 

Jake [59:47 - 59:52]: Actually my favorite part. Do any of us have luck points right now that we can spend? 

Dallas [59:52 - 59:54]: Yeah, you all got Scad's luck points. 

Gotfree [59:54 - 59:56]: I will spend a luck point. 

Dallas [59:56 - 1:00:02]: All right, so what do you want to. What do you want? You have to ask me something. I can't just tell you. 

Jake [1:00:02 - 1:00:14]: Make it worth our while. There's like we're missing something. I know that. But what we're gonna meet in Harrison for weapons. We understand that Carlos is a bad guy now for suresies. 

Dallas [1:00:14 - 1:00:15]: Do you know that for sure? 

Gotfree [1:00:16 - 1:00:22]: The audience knows that for sure. My name's Carlos Mendoza and you're ain't. 

Dallas [1:00:22 - 1:00:29]: Gonna remember any of this. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. Dang it. I really got into that part and forgot what I said. 

Jake [1:00:32 - 1:00:42]: We don't know this, Houston. I have an understanding that he's a bad guy. And then I just asked you about Carlos. Are we missing anything? 

Dallas [1:00:42 - 1:00:47]: I don't know. Do you want to spend a luck point and make a magic wish to know something? 

Jake [1:00:47 - 1:00:54]: Magic wish? I mean, William, are you just going to ask to know something? How does that work? Do we just ask to know something? 

Dallas [1:00:55 - 1:01:05]: Yes. And I can't lie. I don't have to tell you a whole truth, but I can't lie. I can't like give you things like you can't like spin like point. I'm like. And here's a rocket powered. 

Jake [1:01:05 - 1:01:12]: Do we defeat the enemies of this game? How do I get the best ending? That's what I always ask. 

Dallas [1:01:12 - 1:01:15]: I need to min max my build here, so. 

Houston [1:01:15 - 1:01:19]: Oh, here, here's some anti cannibal sharded rice, you know. 

Jake [1:01:19 - 1:02:06]: Okay. Okay. So I think the plan is that we are taking Jeremy and Grumbly down to Dustridge to then get the rest of the boys and attack Carlos or at least try to escape the Carlos situation. Sort that out. Karl, Carlos, whoever he is. Then from there we have another night to get to. So there'll be one night there. Then we'll have one night up to Harrison where we're going to meet Klaus and he is going to help us stop the onslaught from the cannibals. Does that sound right to everybody? Am I tracking what? Yeah, anything that we're missing before we go, could we just potentially talk it out? 

Gotfree [1:02:07 - 1:02:16]: Could we just rescue the boys who've been sent to rescue Carl and make like a tree and get out of there? 

Dallas [1:02:17 - 1:02:18]: Like they're going tree. 

Jake [1:02:18 - 1:02:20]: I mean, out of there. Yep. Yep. 

Houston [1:02:20 - 1:02:25]: Is it possible that they're not even there yet? We can catch them before they even reach Carl? 

Jake [1:02:26 - 1:02:32]: Yeah. Is there a, like a signal system? How do the boys talk to each other? Like, how do they communicate? 

Dallas [1:02:32 - 1:02:35]: Well, they usually always travel together. 

Jake [1:02:35 - 1:02:35]: Okay. 

Dallas [1:02:35 - 1:02:37]: Like they usually are never apart like this. 

Jake [1:02:38 - 1:02:43]: So does Claus have a way to communicate with the boys at a distance? 

Dallas [1:02:43 - 1:02:46]: Like, are you asking, are you asking. 

Gotfree [1:02:46 - 1:02:59]: Claus or Mr. Klaus? Is it possible? Do you have a way of communicating with your found family here from a distance? Do you Have a way of getting a message to them. 

Dallas [1:02:59 - 1:03:02]: Would you like to roll or spend a luck point? 

Gotfree [1:03:02 - 1:03:04]: I would like to spend luck point. 

Dallas [1:03:04 - 1:03:15]: Okay. And you're asking Carl, you don't want to just know? Because I can just with luck point I can just tell you or do you want to ask ask Carl. Is that depends on whether or not I click a button or clause? 

Jake [1:03:15 - 1:03:19]: Yeah, I would ask Carl, are you a bad guy? 

Gotfree [1:03:21 - 1:03:27]: I. I would like to ask Mr. Klosinski, do you have a way with. 

Jake [1:03:27 - 1:03:32]: A luck point or with a roll? Give us an automatic answer. 

Gotfree [1:03:32 - 1:03:42]: Master of the game. I would like to spend a lot point. Just yo acquire this information. Does he have a way of communicating with his children? 

Dallas [1:03:43 - 1:04:01]: Yes, he does. So because they were historically in the vault, their occupation was lumberjacks and because that is what they were doing research on. So the way that they communicate. 

Jake [1:04:01 - 1:04:06]: Sorry, they're laughing already. How do they communicate? How do they do it? 

Dallas [1:04:06 - 1:04:07]: So they. 

Jake [1:04:07 - 1:04:09]: You're laughing already. 

Dallas [1:04:11 - 1:04:47]: They climb a tree and they put like a light at the top of the tree. And if. And if the tree is. And in order for you to be able to see like if you were like not able to see the top of the tree, they also put lots of lights and other things like down the tree as well. So like different lights and shiny bits and bobs all over the tree. So that way if you see one of those trees with like a. Like a light at the top, the beacons are usually like a star on the top of the tree. 

Jake [1:04:47 - 1:04:51]: Put little bobbles and like, like twine bailing twine around it, that sort of thing. 

Dallas [1:04:51 - 1:05:03]: Whatever they could find. Yeah. Popped grapes strung on strings. And also they grow that way now. Right. So if you see one of those. 

Jake [1:05:03 - 1:05:12]: Trees from afar or around other decorative ornamentation on this, they call them signals. 

Dallas [1:05:12 - 1:05:14]: Decorative signals. Yes. 

Jake [1:05:14 - 1:05:17]: Ornamental signals. Got it. Yeah. Yes. 

Dallas [1:05:18 - 1:05:25]: So yeah, if you see one of those trees, if they find like a manufactured one, they just use the same one over and over again. 

Jake [1:05:25 - 1:05:35]: They do have a way to communicate with each other. They do these decorative lit trees. And. And it is an evergreen forest, of course. 

Gotfree [1:05:35 - 1:05:51]: Now is this, is this just a binary on off a signal? Gives a general impression like danger, like safe, like go stop. 

Houston [1:05:51 - 1:05:52]: Is it more scary? 

Gotfree [1:05:52 - 1:06:01]: Is it. Can we can convey actual like messages? What I'm asking, can we send a message to Stompy and the rest? 

Dallas [1:06:02 - 1:06:12]: Come home, leave not from where you are. It's only line of sight. You would have to get at least close enough to see the beacon trees. 

Gotfree [1:06:12 - 1:06:31]: Well that's at Least better. And knowing them, is it common practice for them to establish a beacon tree wherever they are? If they have arrived at Corals, they would have gone ahead and prepped a beacon tree. Yes, to be able to send and receive messages. 

Dallas [1:06:32 - 1:06:35]: They're very discreet. They're so good at it. Unless you were looking for it, you would not know it. 

Gotfree [1:06:35 - 1:06:38]: Jeremy, do you know how to make one of these trees? 

Klawzinski [1:06:38 - 1:06:44]: Yes, I made one outside the camp while you guys were out here talking amongst yourselves. 

Jake [1:06:44 - 1:06:45]: You did? 

Gotfree [1:06:45 - 1:06:46]: Of course. 

Klawzinski [1:06:46 - 1:06:48]: Yeah, out of habit. 

Gotfree [1:06:49 - 1:07:07]: Okay, I propose that we get within line of sight of Carl, use the beacon trees to summon them away, and we boot scoot and boogie to Harrison to meet up with Mr. Kloss. 

Jake [1:07:07 - 1:07:16]: I like this idea. Agreed. All right, so we have to head towards Dustridge. We have the boys, we have the know how. I think that's it. 

Dallas [1:07:16 - 1:07:16]: Sounds good. 

Gotfree [1:07:17 - 1:07:26]: I. I have metal singes on my dome that make me look metal. Af. I will intimidate everyone I meet on the trail. 

Dallas [1:07:26 - 1:07:31]: They look like the coolest rope burns that anyone has ever seen. 

Gotfree [1:07:34 - 1:07:35]: I'm ready. 

Dallas [1:07:36 - 1:08:29]: All right, so you guys pack your things. Mr. Kleczynski, he grabs a very. To you guys, very large stick that looks very small to him, though, with a blanket, a red blanket that he has put some of his belongings in, has tied and put on the stick and has slung it over his shoulder, and he turns and tells his robots to take care of the place and, you know, to have a good night, and he trundles off into the darkness of the cave, and you guys follow right behind him, maybe to me, very mindful. And that is where you guys and this chapter of your story heading off into the wild dark yonder to Dustridge. 

Jake [1:08:29 - 1:08:52]: Hey, here's the real question. When you prepped three pages for our encounter with Mr. Claus, and we took three episodes that didn't even cover the first page of your notes in prep, have we even remotely gotten to where you were? Or have you scrapped what was on those other two and a half pages? 

Dallas [1:08:52 - 1:09:02]: We. We have finally gotten to some of the. Yeah, the. The pages have. Are. Are living pages. They're very. 

Jake [1:09:04 - 1:09:07]: You guys, the pages are made up and the pages don't matter. 

Dallas [1:09:07 - 1:09:13]: Yeah, when I said I made those, I meant I was going to make them at some point in the beach. 

Jake [1:09:13 - 1:09:48]: Well, it is a joy to be back. If you like what you've heard tonight, this is one show of three as part of the Grapefruit Network. We are a production of the Grapefruit Network, and we've got two sister shows. We've got a doctor and a lawyer walking to a bar that's currently on hiatus right now. We're taking a little summer break on that one. I guess we're calling it fall break for that one. But we have also got Potter plus, which is our Harry Potter chat show led by our resident Godfrey over here. 

Gotfree [1:09:48 - 1:09:51]: William, you're a resident neurotic British robot. 

Jake [1:09:52 - 1:10:13]: If it is your first time here, you are probably confused as all get out. And if you've made it to this point, God love you, but you should go back and check everything else out. We have been having a blast playing this game and we are looking forward to what comes next. So with that, I have been Jake Winger. 

Dallas [1:10:13 - 1:10:17]: I am your game master, and I'm. 

Gotfree [1:10:17 - 1:10:20]: Debating on keeping these scorch marks permanently. 

Houston [1:10:20 - 1:10:22]: And I have a drinking problem. 

Gotfree [1:10:22 - 1:10:23]: Don't we all? 

Jake [1:10:24 - 1:10:27]: We will see you all next time. 

Dallas [1:10:27 - 1:10:27]: Bye.